In Acts 11:15-17 Peter says, “As I began to speak, the Holy Spirit came on them as he had come on us at the beginning.  Then I remembered what the Lord had said: ‘John baptized with water, but you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit.’  So if God gave them the same gift as he gave us, who was I to think that I could oppose God?”

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Have you ever wondered why some Christians speak in tongues and others do not?  Have you ever thought that speaking in tongues was unnecessary, unprofitable, lacking value in your walk with the Lord?  Did you ever think those who spoke in tongues were kind of weird?  I did!

My journey with the Lord first began when I was very young.  Looking back, I can see so many ways the Lord was calling me to Himself.  From the times I spent in Vacation Bible School as a little girl playing games around the bushes outside the church, to later days of attending church by myself just because I wanted to go and no one else in my family was going.

It was not until after I married in 1977 that I actually accepted Jesus as Lord of my life, even though I had believed in Him for most of my life. During a weekend business conference in Norfolk, VA in 1982, my husband Bruce and I responded to an altar call and committed our lives to Jesus.  That was the beginning of an incredible journey, a journey where God would prove Himself faithful through many twists and turns in my life, including the loss of a full-term stillborn baby in 1987, the loss of my husband to cancer in 1989, and the reality of raising three children as a single mom for 15 years, all by God’s grace.

In 2004 I married my second husband Ted, and we had conversations about speaking in tongues and he told me it didn’t matter to him that I did not do this, but over time it became apparent to me that this was not really the case.  He often used the words “Spirit-filled” and I began to resent this very much because I felt like he considered me less of a Christian and looked at me as not “Spirit-filled” because I didn’t speak in tongues.

Oh, the resentment I felt.  “There it is again,” I would think whenever I would hear someone say those words. How I wanted to prove them wrong, show them that I could be just as “Spirit-filled” without speaking in tongues.  I knew I had the Holy Spirit living inside of me and I just did not understand what this could mean in my life.  That is, until God got hold of me!  Who was I to think that I could oppose God?

The rest of my journey…

While walking with the Lord for almost 28 years and seeing His hand upon my life in so many ways, I felt as if I had a terrific relationship with Him, and I was content with that.  I thought my walk with the Lord was just fine and I didn’t need to speak in tongues.  I had already been water baptized and didn’t understand a second baptism.

This is referred to in Matthew 3:11 where John the Baptist states, “I baptize you with water for repentance, but he who is coming after me is mightier than I, whose sandals I am not worthy to carry. He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and fire.” – Jesus’ words while meeting with His disciples after his resurrection are recorded in Acts 1:4-5, “for John baptized with water, but you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit not many days from now.”

Acts 2:1-4 says, “When the day of Pentecost arrived, they were all together in one place. And suddenly there came from heaven a sound like a mighty rushing wind, and it filled the entire house where they were sitting. And divided tongues as of fire appeared to them and rested on each one of them. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as the Spirit gave them utterance.” ESV

I certainly did not understand these scriptures, and I was certain that I already had the Holy Spirit living inside of me, so I basically disregarded them.  I was content in my walk with God, and I was comfortable.

But God always wants to stretch us beyond our comfort zones.  God always has more for us, and oftentimes more than we are ready to accept.  God always prompts us to stretch and grow out of ourselves, into the person He has for us to become, but I still refused to accept that speaking in tongues might be something God had for me.

Then in January 2009, a guest speaker came and ministered at our church for a four-day conference.  My husband and I attended every session, soaking up every word he said.  It was on Sunday night that the speaker asked anyone who had not received the baptism of the Holy Spirit to come forward.

At the prompting of my husband Ted I went up to the front, but I was very nervous and uncomfortable.  Here I was, a member of this church for five years, surrounded by people who spoke in tongues, but still believing it was not for me and I did not need it.  People prayed over me but my mouth froze and not even English words came out.

It wasn’t until Wednesday morning in the shower as I was praying and asking God to help me yield to this if He did intend for me to have it that tongues finally started to flow out of my mouth, and it was very exciting to me!!

Such a new and incredible journey…

What an incredible journey with God since that glorious morning.  At that time, God showed me that I would write the book I had always dreamed of writing, and that “book” has become this blog, for which He gets all the praise, glory and honor.  Thanks be to God the Father, my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit who lives within me and guides and directs me throughout my life!

So, why did it take me almost 28 years to receive the baptism of the Holy Spirit?  How could I walk with God all those years and still not receive the fullness and power He had for me?  God answered that question that Wednesday morning in the shower.  He told me it was my pride.  Ouch!!  Remember I said I wanted to prove others wrong, prove that I could be just as filled with the Holy Spirit as they were without speaking in tongues?  God showed me that was my ugly pride hindering me from receiving all that He had for me.

Who was I to think that I could oppose God?

The Fullness of God’s Power…

My walk with the Lord since receiving the baptism of the Holy Spirit has been even more incredible than the previous 28 years.  I have truly experienced the power of God that comes with this baptism.  I now understand there are two baptisms we need once we accept Christ.  I had been water baptized along with my first husband in 1984 but have come to realize there is a second baptism the bible refers to, and this is the baptism of the Holy Spirit.  Jesus gives us this baptism as we receive His spirit and the fullness thereof, and this is then manifested in our lives through the gift of speaking in tongues.  We, however, must be willing to yield to this.  He will not force it on us.

Many people say that you do not have to speak in tongues, and certainly you do not.  But if you want all the fullness of God’s power in your life, then you will want to be baptized with the Holy Spirit.  I have truly experienced this fullness and power in my own life and am writing to give testimony to it.  Glory be to God!

Who was I to think that I could oppose God?

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“As I began to speak, the Holy Spirit came on them as he had come on us at the beginning.  Then I remembered what the Lord had said: ‘John baptized with water, but you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit.’  So if God gave them the same gift as he gave us, who was I to think that I could oppose God?”~Acts 11:15-18

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